For many it’s true that we are supposed to learn something in our life, others believe it’s about healing karma and some think life’s hard lessons are there to strengthen us to be better prepared to deal with life’s challenges… I think all of them are right. As you perceive life, you will most likely experience life.
Lately I saw a test where they put different film music’s under one fighting movie scene. It was hilarious to see. The funny music, just made me grin when one was flying over the table after a hit. Then there was an action music, the whole scene changed for me and I felt excited and tensed. Then with the dramatic music I had almost tears in my eyes and wanted to jump in to help and comfort.
Our main beliefs we have about life colour drastically our perception and with that our feelings and impulses we experience while living, just like a movie music colours the movie and determines your experience.
For the longest time I belonged to the group of people that think that we have to learn and to develop in life in order to live a life by own design. That my life was a product of my subconscious mind; the inside is the outside. Quite frustrating often since my outside was not looking smooth. I was challenged in many ways and thought it were my subconscious limiting beliefs, like I am not deserving, or I am guilty etc. that made all those things happen in my life. I also wanted this flow people talked about when one had reached true congruence with the life he wants to create. I wanted to be a better person, I wanted a better life.
It’s one way of looking at life, it’s a film music that coloured my experience, my focus and foremost my feelings about myself. I wanted to believe that I was this shiny diamond only not yet polished, but mostly I felt like a clump of black something, not much of shining to be seen.
In 2012 in some silent retreats I got a very different awareness and experience of what life actually is about and how it functions. I wrote even a book about it. Although those awarenesses are now true to me, it does not matter if it’s really true or not. I believe we can choose the film music colouring our film called life. And I for sure choose a — fun, exciting, emotional, intense and light all at the same time —music.
For me life has become a playground and I am invited to play freely with anything that is in it. It’s not there to teach me anything, but it’s there to inspire me, to make me curious, to stimulate me so that I feel motivated to stretch myself, to try things I have never done and by that to experience what IS all in me. I discover AUTOMATICALLY my qualities, not because I am good at it, but because I feel drawn to them, they are already in me, they made me climb the tree in the first place. I evolve my very own nature while playing, while living. It’s more an exciting adventure to experience what all lies in me, it’s fun to stretch, to try, to fall and stand up again. Life puts in my playground all which is stimulating, inspiring and foremost personally designed for me to enjoy myself in my ordinary life.
Do I hang upside down in the tree I climb at times, you bat I do. And while feeling so challenged I feel life twinkles at me and says: “just go ahead, I am here watching, I would not have put it into your playground if it would not be possible for you, or not good for you, I help you.”
When I heard this the first time I thought, yah, yah sure you are helping, why do you let me hang here upside down in the first place, where is your help, huh?
Then I remembered how I supported my children when they were struggling, I also did not do it for them, I trusted that they can do it. I encouraged, comforted, made sure they knew I was with them, but I trusted them to be able to make it.
It’s often not the practical help, many of us are very independent, but our feeling that nobody looks supportively after us and our doubt if we make the right choices and how to move on. We expect criticism and blame instead of comforting words when we are already disappointed because we did not get or manage what we expected……
I don’t expect life to give me freely in a flow what I want, I also don’t have any feeling that I am lacking something in me, I know I am complete potential and I don’t need to proof it or extra strive for it, a bit slower or faster in eternal life does not really matter (we talk about time another time). I am AUTOMATICALLY evolving while living my life, life takes care of that. I accept my nature, all of it. ( incl. the part that has a hard time to accept )
I have learned to open my eyes and heart to see how life cares for me, stimulates me, guides me. This I called the Gifts of Life. I feel loved and carried by life freely, lightly and unconditionally.
Life is my personal playground and I am ready to play. I am ready to live life fully, to climb the tree if I like or to do something else on my playground. I can’t go wrong and if I am getting lazy and rather like to sit and sleep under the tree (living in my comfort zone) instead of climbing it, life will think of something to wake me up for a play….it always does.
So I ask you what music plays in YOUR head about life?
In case this speaks to you and you feel that you would love to play life, feel free to let me know using the form below. I am happy to share with you your biggest illusion you live, why life does not feel like a playground to you (yet).
Much love Karin
(from 14th till 26th of september I will be on a silent retreat and not able to respond to your request, nevertheless do not hesitate to send it, I will attend to it as soon as I return. Thanks for understanding. Much love Karin )