Pain’s Paradox – A Woman’s Journey

A woman found herself captivated by a strange idea. It was an idea so extraordinary, so unconventional, that it challenged the very fabric of nature itself. In the natural world, every living thing had its rightful place. Not a single creature questioned its purpose or sought to unravel the mysteries of its existence. But there was one exception: us, the human race. We seemed to march to the beat of a different drum.

This woman spent sleepless nights pondering why humans stood apart from all other species and elements on this planet. Then, a thought occurred to her: what if she flipped the paradigm? What if she posited that each human being had a distinct, innate place within the complex web of life—a perfect harmony with the cosmos? Intrigued, she embraced this idea and contemplated its implications. What truths would emerge if her hypothesis held water? What thinking errors hindered us from realizing our place and caused our suffering? These ruminations led her to uncover ten major thinking mistakes that plagued us, particularly those afflicted by an Inner Saboteur.

First on her list was the fallacy that humans must avoid pain at all costs, for pain was inherently wrong. Mistakes, it was believed, brought forth suffering, and suffering was definetly bad. But, she wondered, if this were indeed a mistake, then the following proposition should hold true: humans cannot err, but they can experience pain. Pain, she concluded, was not a mistake; it was an integral part of life’s natural process. In exploring other species, this notion became apparent. When a lion hunted and killed an antelope, the prey felt pain, yet the lion delighted in feeding its pride. Was the antelope wrong to have been caught? Should it have fled in the opposite direction, abandoning its vulnerable calf? Would that have been a better outcome? Upon reflection, it became clear that pain and loss were natural facets of existence. They were not mistakes.

Considering this perspective, she questioned whether it was wrong for humans to cause pain, both to themselves and others. When she unawares hurt herself, it became an experience from which she could learn, potentially avoiding similar actions in the future. When she unawares hurt others, it served as an opportunity for growth, prompting reflection and change in both parties. Was it a mistake that such incidents occurred? Should they have been avoided? Or were they merely natural aspects of our journey toward learning and maturing? Did it truly matter whether we grew through pain or inspiration? Observing the majority, it became evident that pain served as a far more potent motivator for personal development. As much as we resisted it, pain seemed still necessary. However, being the one who caused pain came at a price—it risked rejection and disapproval. It required immense sacrifice to be willing to inflict hurt for the sake of others’ growth. It was a sacrifice often overshadowed by the desire to appear great without having assisted someone in their own evolution. This, she acknowledged, was somewhat selfish, though it possessed a more pleasing facade.

What if, she pondered, we embraced the idea that every action we took, regardless of whether it caused pain or inspiration, propelled our development and made a difference? Why couldn’t we trust our inherent nature and acknowledge that every moment in our lives was right, regardless of the presence of pain or joy? Could we be ready to disappoint and hurt, knowing that it aided our awareness and growth? Were we prepared to embody that selfless individual who was willing to cause pain and face rejection, understanding that we are also an integral part of nature? Pain itself did not cause suffering; it was our resistance to pain that bred suffering.

We are invited to learn to perceive pain as pain—neither good nor bad—while recognizing that suffering arises from our resistance to it. Pain, in its essence, is unavoidable and natural. No matter how hard we strive to be virtuous, we all inevitably cause harm to others or ourselves at some point. So, instead of condemning these actions, why not accept that they are crucial for our awareness and our ability to choose differently in the future? They become catalysts for growth and transformation.

Can you find peace within yourself, regardless of whether your actions bring pain to you or others? Can you grasp the significance of wholeheartedly serving the present moment, becoming consciously interconnected with nature without suffering or longing for a different reality?

It took me a considerable amount of time to perceive myself as an integral part of nature and to fulfill my role without resistance. I discovered that, like many others, I learn and find motivation through pain. If that’s the way it is, so be it. I cease striving consciously to be the good one and instead embrace my true self without resistance, without needing to be liked for it.

It is natural for us to strive to be the good one, seeking approval, love, and acceptance. Yet, in this pursuit, we unknowingly cage ourselves, burdened by self-doubt and regret. The fertilizer for our Inner Saboteur. Little do we realize that true freedom lies in living ourself naturally. Taking our place naturally and developing and evolving naturally!

Soon, I will share the second of the ten thinking mistakes that hinder us from choosing to feel authentically and naturally ourselves.

If you find this interesting, you might want to join one of my free workshops: click here and I inform you as soon as I organize one!


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